We had a wonderful Thanksgiving with our extended family (on James' side). As the afternoon began to progress into the evening, James mentioned that his calcium level was dropping a bit too low. Normally when that happens, he would take quite a few Calcium-enriched Tums as they metabolize the quickest and then he'd "pop a D" meaning he would bite open one of his liquid-filled Rocaltrol pills. He would then take a few of his regular calcium tablets as well. All of these steps combined would then cause his blood calcium levels to stabilize and his hypocalcemia symptoms to subside. (Thanksgiving + Full Tetany = NO!!!!!) The Chvostek ("Shvah' shtek") check was also a bit alarming so at that point I was anxious to get him home. My mother-in-law had a HUGE Costco-sized bottle of Tums which of course was helpful but we stupidly forgot to bring any of his Rocaltrol (vitamin D) to puncture and take with it. So as quickly as I was able, I loaded the family back into the van and we made the trek back home. Once back home, James immediately "popped a D" and stretched out in his chair for the night. The less he moves the better. That way his body uses up the least amount of calcium in his blood as blood calcium is required for the muscles to move. (which is why when there is a lack of calcium in the blood tetany, or muscle spasms and eventual paralysis, occurs) As usual, it took about 4 hours or so for him to fully stabilize but as of this morning he is doing just fine. I know all of this information can seem a bit confusing but it's really just another "normal" for us. A way of life that we're very used to after almost 10 years of going through it. Sometimes it feels a little like Russian Roulette though. Take for instance last night when I had to choose to drive the complete OPPOSITE direction of the hospital (40 minutes in the opposite direction) in order to get James to his medication which would HOPEFULLY resolve his tetany issues in time. Do we stay close to the hospital and hope he stabilizes without his Rocaltrol or go home and hope he gets the Rocaltrol in time??? *sigh* I would be lying if I said I don't go through my whiny "life isn't fair" moments. I hate this. I really hate thinking about all of the times I've almost lost my husband to the side issues of his cancer and not the cancer itself. Believe me, I KNOW I've been blessed beyond measure as well. He died in my arms almost exactly 9 years ago but God gave him back to me and we've had such a wonderful life together. I have to stop focusing on the "what ifs" and whether or not I'll be too late to help him this time or the next time. I CAN say however that I'm going to double and triple check to make sure we always have an extra supply of his meds wherever we go. Last night's lapse in judgment at least came with a good lesson, right? :) God has given us today. Today is beautiful. Today is another gift, another day I get to spend with my beloved. My heart. My first and only love. He is the best thing that ever happened to me and I can't spend ENOUGH time with him! 60 years together wouldn't even scratch the surface of the time I want to spend with him. But today, I have TODAY. I'm going to spend it with my sweetheart and thank my God for giving us yet another TODAY. :)

I hope you all had a wonderful Thanksgiving!!

My beloved is home, home, HOME!!!!!! Praise be to God!!! :)

I went in to visit my sweetie again this morning. He was still in the ICU at the time although they moved him to a regular ward earlier this afternoon so they can discharge him tomorrow morning! Already!! I'm SO excited!! I can't WAIT to bring him home!!!!!

On a brief side note, his doctor decided (in spite of James and I protesting) to keep James on a continuous calcium IV drip all day yesterday. Sure enough, James' blood calcium level began to go too high, although not dangerously so. The result was a 'calcium headache' upon waking (think of your worst migraine times 10). He had the nurse contact the doctor who reluctantly gave permission for the IV calcium drip to be discontinued. This particular doctor can be a bit stinky at times. Oh well, at least he's letting my baby come home in the morning! :)

I spoke with James last night around 1:00am and went in to visit him this morning. Currently he's in the ICU on a 12-lead (heart monitor) as he usually is for the first few days. When his blood calcium level gets too low it messes with the rest of his body chemistry, including his heart. His heart is becoming overtaxed from the calcium fluctuations over the past 9+ years. So far there doesn't seem to be any permanent damage and I pray it stays that way but his sitting heart rate continues to be dangerously high.

As far as the tetany he was experiencing last night, they have him on a calcium drip through his IV. He was fighting me a little regarding going into the hospital as he was terrified the doctor was going to have to put in a main line because of the years of IV calcium which has hardened his veins making it extremely difficult to insert a standard IV. Jamie and I prayed on the way home from the hospital (after we dropped him off) last night that God would send someone who could successfully insert a standard IV so he wouldn't have to go the main line route. He said the first ER nurse tried a few times and couldn't get a cooperative vein but a second nurse came in and was able to successfully insert the IV. Praise Jesus!! I noticed this morning that his left wrist (the IV site) is bandaged up pretty good to prevent it from bending at the point where the IV goes in. I know a lot of you probably already know about a lot of the medical terms, etc. but for those of you who don't, I'm just trying to help a bit.

When I saw him this morning, he looked a thousand times better than he did last night. I expect him to be in the hospital for the better part of the week at least. Our pastor called this morning to check on the children and I and let me know that he would also be going in to visit James today. I'll continue to update as needed.

I just dropped my beloved off at the hospital. Same old same old. We've all been battling the "Whine" flu and because of James' health issues, it's hit him rather hard. (heart issues and partial tetany) I'll update as I get news. *sigh* Gotta run...have 5 little ones to get up at the crack of dawn and off to school.

Thank you, all for your kind words and comments. Your prayers also are felt by us. I apologize for the tone of that last post. I was a bit "whiny" that day, wasn't I?? ;-) Anyway, James has been able to stay out of the hospital for a while now (a week+!) which is always encouraging news. Between the M.E.N.1/cancer issues and now the tachycardia issues along with the fairly recent medication stabilization problems, it sometimes seems he is IN the hospital more than OUT. Regardless of having to stay put in his chair all day I am really enjoying just having him HERE. I can always feel his presence near me wherever I might happen to be in the house rather than so far away from him when he's admitted. That little "In sickness and in health" clause within traditional wedding vows never really seems like too big of a deal when you're just dealing with colds/flu or even the occasional surgery. But when your spouse, lover, best friend, etc. is continually wracked with pain, discouraged and frightened, needing you to care for and even "baby" them now more than ever, it takes on a whole new meaning! That's where faith in God comes in! He wants nothing more than to strengthen our resolve and faith in Him, continuously renewing us and teaching us lessons in patience, faith, etc. He is always so close even when we become so discouraged and wants, NEEDS us to cry out to Him. I seem to do that quite a lot and do you know what? He's never failed to answer me. Sometimes I don't care too much for the answer but it and HE is always there.

Today was a bad day. James' heart medication keeps him in his chair sleeping 24/7 and as you can imagine with a busy household, I am rather at my wit's end by the end of the day. I've been crying for the past hour or so. The cancer hasn't stolen him from me yet and his heart may not have given up yet but at times I already feel like a widow. I guess that makes me a really bad person.

James called me at 6:19 this morning from the hospital. He'd forgotten that today is Saturday and I wasn't up early getting the children ready for school. So much for sleeping in, right?? It was good to hear his voice though. I miss him so much. He mentioned that the results from his two scans two days ago didn't show anything significant so that's pretty good news! The scans weren't as clear as we would have liked (i.e. a fine-cut CT scan) so that a lot more detail would show up but we're still fairly satisfied with the news! Still no results from yesterday's scan though. He's hoping to be released from the hospital today, as am I obviously! The doctor mentioned that his blood calcium level (which was at a 6 when he arrived at the emergency room for those of you who understand that sort of thing...and how it was amazing he was still alive at that point with his level so low!!!) was still dragging a little on the low side as of last night. James mentioned that it wouldn't be and would have actually been just fine had the doctor not disconnected the IV that was GIVING HIM CALCIUM the day before yesterday!!! DUH?!? It's usually prudent to wait until the patient's blood chemistry is STABLE before removing his intravenious meds which were currently being used to fix said problem!!!! I wish doctors knew more about my husband's illness. At times James and I have to explain a lot of the aspects of the disease to the doctors rather than the other way around!

James is back up at the VA Hospital in Missouri again. Ok. Rewind that. A lot. It's been a year since I've posted here and so much has happened to us! First and foremost (as those of you who read my main journal already know) we bought our first home (in Arkansas) 2,500 miles away from where we were currently living (California). So now instead of going to San Francisco for treatment, James is going to Poplar Bluff, Missouri. His Oncology care is up in St. Louis (Missouri) though. That in and of itself presents some problems financially for us as it's so far away and getting up there and paying for room and board as well as food, etc. We know that the Lord has always provided for our needs according to His will and He won't fail us now!

So anyway, James was transported up there from our local hospital via ambulance early this morning around 4:30 am CST. Early this year he contracted a nasty virus called Clostridium. It's a very nasty Botulism-related virus. He's back in now for the same thing. I just spoke with him and he said when the doctor came in to see him (same DR he had the last time - very helpful) he said that the Clostridium virus can seem to go away completely but in fact it's really lying dormant elsewhere in the body. So now it's back and he's on round two of antibiotics. The doctor seems to think that James is just more prone to things like this because of the shape his body is in. The biggest threat at this point is dehydration so he's being flushed with IV fluids to remedy that.

As for treatments of any kind, everything's on hold for now. I hate that it is. I hate to think of the cancer that's been growing or spreading since November of 2005. It's times like these when I have to almost minute-by-minute put my faith and control into God's capable hands.

James is home safe and sound from a week of appointments in San Francisco. The results of the CT scan showed that the tumors in his lungs (and most likely the ones in his neck also) have indeed grown and that we can go ahead and begin radiation. So he will be going back to San Francisco on the 27th of March to begin two weeks of his final lifetime-allowed radiation threatment. Beyond this, if the tumors grow back as they have twice already we will be left without any other options save surgery. The amount and placement of the tumors in his lungs would make it extremely difficult for surgery to take place. So we're praying for a miracle. This radiation treatment HAS to work! I know that God can still perform miracles and I believe one can happen where James is concerned. Dr. S did mention that even if all else fails it would still take a year or two for the cancer to take his life. God's will only be done.

He'll be in San Francisco next week for a number of various appointments. Arthritis, Optometry (a mixture of the meds he's on can cause eye problems), Pulmonology (lung), Oncology, the whole gamut. I believe they'll be making an appointment for his next round of radioactive iodine. They're still waiting for the cancer in his lungs to grow to an acceptable, treatable level.

James went back to S.F. a few weeks ago to speak with the Cardiologist, Pulmonologist and Endocrinologist. They determined that the tumors in James's lungs are too small to treat. They need to grow more before they can do anything, most likely his final dose of radioactive iodine as metastatic thyroid cancer doesn't respond to chemo. Once they give him the radiation, he will no longer produce saliva on his own as what's left of his salivary glands will be destroyed (burned) by the radiation. So now we just wait for the tumors to grow. That's not a very comforting thought to be sure but we don't really have a choice at this point.

We're having quite a bit of rain today. We had a few errands to run this morning as a family and James had a hard time getting around. He uses a cane all the time but it only aids him it doesn't take his pain away. He's doing alright though and trying to stay cheerful for the sake of the children. I can see how much he hurts though and it pains my heart so to see him suffer. I wish there was something I could do for him to take away his pain. If only I could take all of his discomfort upon me for a day. Just to give him a break. I would do it as often as I could. Please continue to keep my beloved in your prayers.

Please be in prayer for James. He's having some setbacks. The healing from his lung surgery is so very slow. He's in a great deal of pain and we would really covet your prayers right now. Thank you so much.

Tomorrow, James will be going back to a Cardio-Thoracic doctor in Sacramento to discuss some complications he's experiencing from his surgery. He's still in quite a bit of pain among other odd things. Please be in prayer for him if you have a moment.

James is still recovering well. I keep the humidifier going all day in the living room next to his big chair and all night next to his side of the bed. He's still pretty sore but all in all is doing a bit better each day.

Our church has been such a tremendous blessing! For about the past month and a half or so a family from our church has been bringing over a meal every other night. What a huge load off my shoulders!! There have been people bringing over gallons of milk almost daily, boxes upon boxes of diapers in almost every size (we still have four children in diapers at night and two during the day so we go through them rather quickly!) and so many other household and sundry items! For thanksgiving, a local business put together a HUGE, decorated basket full to the brim with items for a thanksgiving feast! Oh yes, and a turkey! (which, by the way will be turned into post-thanksgiving soup tomorrow!) Another family from church will be buying a Christmas tree for us and still others want to help out with Christmas gifts for the children. I am amazed at the blessings we've been given! I pray that each of you who have prayed, sacrificed and encouraged us will be blessed tenfold. Thank you, all so very much. :-)

A few questions answered:
(Tamara) ~ "By lifetime limit, does that mean he'll never be able to receive radiation in the future?"
No, he won't. At this point giving him more radiation will only add to his problems rather than solve them. The last two treatments almost completely burned out his salivary glands and Dr. S. suspects this next dose will do just that. Also, beyond this dose of radiation, they will have to surgically remove anything else that comes back. All of his radiation therapy will in fact increase his odds of developing other types of cancer in the future but we don't have a choice. It will also be difficult to detect whether or not this treatment even works. We still don't know what the other masses are (yet?) either or how to treat them.


(Tamara) ~ "How long was he a firefighter? Not that it makes a difference. One time exposure is enough."
He was a firefighter for 6 years and was exposed to some pretty nasty stuff. People have the false idea that all of the protective gear that firefighters wear is 100% (or close to it) effective but that simply isn't the case unfortunately.


(Lori) ~ "This is good news right??"
Yes, Lymphoma or metastisized Thyroid (not papillary) cancer would have been a lot worse and much harder to treat. :)



(Misty) ~ "You'd think after all that radiation he'd be sterile!:) The LORD is gracious, isn't he??"


Oh that was too funny!! Yes, you'd think so! ;)


(Morito) ~ "Do you know the story of Lance Armstrong?"
Yes, we do. Very well in fact. We have been quite encouraged by his story. He and my husband are the exact same age too! :)

If any of you have anymore questions, just throw 'em my way! :) :)

It seems James has metastatic (metastisized) papillary thyroid cancer in his lungs. So he will undergo yet another round (his lifetime limit) of radiation which will Lord-willing take care of it. There are a few other cells they can't seem to identify. They were tested for TB, Lymphoma and other toxins but so far everything is negative. He must have been exposed to something weird while he was a firefighter. That's my best guess.

We're safely home and James is recovering well. He's parked in his recliner and is back in command of the Castleberry Ship. It's SO good to have him back home! Thank you all so much for your prayers!! We still haven't heard from Pathology yet but I'll update you all when we do.

May God be with you all,
James and Rebekah (and family!)

Praise Jesus!! The surgery is over and James is in the Intensive Care Unit recovering quite well! The surgery lasted about 4 hours and they were able to extract three 'nodules' from his right lung without having to go in through his sternum! The pathology results from those will take about a week. PLEASE be praying that it's NOT matastisized thyroid cancer! That would be by far the most difficult (virtually impossible) to treat. He has a chest tube, catheter, an epidural and a bizillion various wires hooked up to him most of which will be taken out tomorrow with the exception of the epidural and chest tube. Those will remain in for another day or two. He's in great spirits and I even brought him chocolate ice cream, whipped cream (he ate all of it!) Oreos, milk, and peppermint patties!

Thank you all so very, very much for your faithful prayers!! I will update again tomorrow evening.